

Surprise! NASA just changed your star sign
Everything is a lie
Astrology devotees might need to sit down for this, but we're sorry to break it to you that, according to the folks at NASA, it turns out you've been reading your horoscope wrong this whole time.
Thanks to shifts in the earth's axis, the placement of the stars has changed quite a bit in the 2000-something year since the zociad was invented. This means, that the stars, moon, planets, energies, etc, you think you were born under and so deeply associate yourself with, are all a lie. It's even worse for the Sagittarians born between November 29 and December 17, you have to now get your head around the fact you aren't a free-spirited archer, but actually a serpent-wrangling bro called Ophiuchus, a brand new 13th sign that was just added. SURPRISE!
Actually though, Ophiuchus isn't all that new - it was part of the original zodiac line-up, and to many astrologers, always has been, but it was omitted by the ancients just to make things equal and easy. Apparently, those "truly" born under the sign are spirited, magnetic, impulsive, clever, flamboyant, and at times jealous, power-hungry, and temperamental. I guess that makes sense, these traits are a clear mix of both Scorpio and Sagittarius, so it's not all that bad. Unless, of course, you're a Leo who was a Cancer all along...
ANWYAY, presenting your ~real~ sign below. Don't shoot the messenger, apprently mercury is in retorograde at the moment. Whatver that means these days...
Capricorn: Jan 20 - Feb 16
Aquarius: Feb 16 - March 11
Pisces: March 11 - April 18
Aries: April 18 - May 13
Taurus: May 13 - June 21
Gemini: June 21 - July 20
Cancer: July 20 - Aug 10
Leo: Aug 10 - Sept 16
Virgo: Sept 16 - Oct 30
Libra: Oct 30 - Nov 23
Scorpio: Nov 23 - Nov 29
Ophiuchus: Nov 29 - Dec 17
Sagittarius: Dec 17 - Jan 20
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